Once you go Jessica

Dear Lee,

Mon, 23 May 2005 18:36:53 GMT

This whole school year I have gone out of my way to be nice to you. I have never done anything mean to you. The only time I have ever spoken about you behind your back is to complain about the fact you have hated me for no reason. When you first came here, I talked to you as soon as I saw you. I introduced you to my friends. I invited you to do things with me. Then people started telling me about how you were talking about how annoying and whatever else I am and my voice is behind my back. Even then I forgave you and tried not to believe the people telling me, despite the fact those people were much more honest with me then you have been. I'm not even going to start on when you and Alastair decided to bitch me out, not because I had done anything wrong to you, but because you didn't like my personality, and, obviously I was forcing you to hang around and talk to me. Recently I assumed we were on okay terms again but apparently still at the very mention of my name, you just have to show your dislike of me. I don't know what to do because apparently you just don't like me and there is nothing I can do about it. I don't like the situation but I dislike the way we're pretending even more. If you don't liike me just say it and we can just not talk to each other anymore. I'd like for us to be friends but I guess I'm not good enough for you.

The Meaning of Zero: A Love Poem

Sun, 22 May 2005 16:02:03 GMT

By: Amy Uyematsu

—Is where space ends called death or infinity?
Pablo Neruda, The Book of Questions

A mere eyelid’s distance between you and me.

It took us a long time to discover the number zero.

John’s brother is afraid to go outside.
He claims he knows
the meaning of zero.

I want to kiss you.

A mathematician once told me you can add infinity
to infinity.

There is a zero vector, which starts and ends
at the same place, its force
and movement impossible
to record with
rays or maps or words.
It intersects yet runs parallel
with all others.

A young man I know
wants me to prove
the zero vector exists.
I tell him I can't,
but nothing in my world
makes sense without it.

Sat, 21 May 2005 02:49:38 GMT

Matt: (says something)
me: what???
Matt: (says something again)
me: what???
Matt: what???
me:...
Matt: yeah...

wow,
isn't that beautiful.

Yep

Fri, 20 May 2005 13:59:19 GMT

Last day of school!
And here I am playing on the computers when I should be studying for my last final.
It smells interesting (someone has been smoking pot) in here...

What bell is that?

Who cares?

I'm bored.

I love you Matt Putney!

Mmmmmm,
summer...

::inspirational words::

Thats what your mom said!

Pretend this post had any purpose.

I love my pants.

But,
I know whos pants I like more...

I mean.

HEY!
LOOK OVER THERE!
::runs away, only to be chased by foreman::

"Say, you'll share with me,

Tue, 17 May 2005 04:13:31 GMT

one love,
one lifetime,
lead me, save me,
from my
solitude,

say, you want me,
with you,
here, beside you,

anywhere you go,
let me go to,

thats all I ask of you..."

I wonder sometimes,
if I'm doing everything wrong.

If I'm making terrible decisions.

I can't detect sincerity,
so I assume things are insincere.

And then I listen to velvet underground songs with not very veiled (at all) sexual refernces.

And they make me laugh.

"... they're busy waiting for her sailor,
who said hes just as big as ever..."

I love you Lou Reed!

GODAMNIT!!!

Sat, 14 May 2005 02:42:03 GMT

I'M SO PARANOID! I RUIN EVERYTHING!!!
I HATE MYSELF!!!

::fails::

AND THIS IS JUST ME BEING PARANOID AGAIN!!!!
DAMNIT!!!

AHHAHAHAHA!!

Fri, 13 May 2005 22:27:06 GMT

Your Erotic Dice Are:

Amazing Erotic Dice Generator

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

how appropriate...

I actually thought this was amusing...

Thu, 12 May 2005 20:41:45 GMT

What side of the bed do you get out of? left
The hand you hold your fork with? right hand!!!
The foot you put a shoe on first? Whichever shoe is facing the most easily accessible direction.
Your current computer desktop wallpaper? The crossed out “W” that’s usually associated with being anti-Bush, but underneath it, it says “The Letter” because as much as I hate George Bush I really hate that letter… It’s a long Latin story… Rebecca made it for me! Its awesome!
The last time you needed a bandaid? Just the other day, when a bullet grazed my face.
How much ketchup do you put on your food? Robots don’t eat ketchup!!!!
How do you greet your friends? Hey, or, Yo, or, Whats up?, or, NO! But You’re Dead! I killed you! I SAW YOU DIE!!!
Biggest fear? Heights, rejection (I’m not just talking about relationships!), Cher, angry people with knives, yuppies, there’s a lot…
Seedless fruit, or with seeds? Doesn’t matter?
How do you eat your Reeses? Through my nose. Yeah. I actually first crush the reeses into powder and then snort them.
You only sing when… No one else is around!!! Or I’m around people who’ve heard me sing for some reason anyway, so they already know to beware.
Number of jackets you own? A lot. God wants me to live in a cold place. Isn’t that right god?
God: YES!
You have a collection of... Ahhahaha!! I’m working on stealing this AWE-
SOME
Collection of Dragon Ball z videos from someone else!!
The poster on your wall is of... Mostly Led Zeppelin, yep, Robert Plant wore some, uh, exceptionally clingy pants, apparently…
Random other stuff:
ARE YOU CURRENTLY GROUNDED? Not yet.
DO YOU SNORE? I don’t believe so???
ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER? I’d say that I’m a lover in all situations that aren’t, uh, checkers related…
AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC? AHHAHAHAHA!!! Yes, definitely, that was my name too, and I rode a blue ox, and I was the size of the empire state building.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY" TV? Disgusting.
DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS? When I want hot straw action.
WERE YOU A CUTE BABY? No. I had a bunch of bruises because, apparently it was a really difficult birth, or at least that’s why my parents say I had bruises…
IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU? Um. Occasionally, but only in the sense that sometimes I get sick of chasing people/relationships/etc. I mean, definitely not in a “play the field” sense, because I’m really big on that crazy monogamy thing.
IS BARBIE SEXY? God! I LOVE anatomically incorrect women! I also LOVE promoting unrealistic physical ideals for young impressionable girls!!! Anorexia is great!
DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER? Yeah....
HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED? Hell
No.
IS JAY LENO FUNNY? I HATE THAT GUY! DAVID LETTERMAN TOTALLY OWNED THAT BITCH! He’ll get his revenge; you better watch your back Leno!
CAN YOU SWIM? Yeeeee-essss
ARE YOU A VIRGIN? Yes.
DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE? I don’t know, sometimes I wonder if maybe it’d be better for all of us, such as, whenever I see April Lavigne.
CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS? I could once, long,
long ago…
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE? I DIDN’T EAT THAT GUY! I SWARE! AND EVEN IF I DID, IT HAD BEEN THREE DAYS, HE WANTED ME TO! YEAH! THAT’S RIGHT!
DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENERS? Pencils are electronic now?
Like, could I watch a movie on one?
WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING? Wrong.
IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE? Only in Vegas, and only if it’s done by an Elvis impersonator.
DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I do, but, no one else does… : (
WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO? White people.
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID "I LOVE YOU"? Wow, like, twenty minutes ago?
IS TUPAC STILL ALIVE? Duh! Everyone knows that Elvis and Tupac are chillen it gangsta style on a deserted island. Stupid.
DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS? Getting really bored is kind of like crying…
HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS? Why does this question seem to have really strong sexual undertones. Is that just me?
IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING? Ignoring the nastiness of the food entirely, that clown guy freaks me out.
ARE YOU IN LOVE? Yeah, with Fabio still, Matt is really jealous, but, he just doesn’t understand our love…
(and with Emma...)
DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS? SHOWERS!!!!
DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED? : )
ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK? No, but, I sleep better with the light on and with a bunch of crap all over my bed, because, that’s how I’ve usually fallen asleep since I was little.
WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO? MATT!
CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK? I thought everyone could? I must be really special then!
HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE? Yeah, that time I overdosed on heroin.
HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY? Once! This morning! And I intend upon brushing them again! Tonight!
ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER? Apparently…
HOW LOUD DO YOU SNEEZE? I once killed a man with my sneeze.
DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE? Yes. I do.
CAN YOU SKATEBOARD? I fall when I walk, why would anyone want me on wheels? That’s just terrible. Roman tried to teach me once, a longgggg time ago, but, yeah. No.
HAVE YOU EVER STOLEN ANYTHING? I actually stole a bunch of these rock things from Disney World when I was a little kid. My parents completely freaked out on me, so, now I only steal from teachers that I don’t like.
DO YOU LIKE CAMPING? Actually, yeah.
ARE YOU HORNY? Never. Sex is G-R-O-S-S, GROSS!
::goes off to file things::
DO YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH? I think I have before, but, not regularly. I have a weird laugh.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE? No. You shouldn’t have gotten married.
WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSEPAD? There isn’t one. I like to live on the wild side.
CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK? Yeah I did it just today too, that was our final in chemistry. Isn’t that right Jessica?
DOES SIZE MATTER? AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But, no.
DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH? Not anymore, because, it gave me cancer.
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KISSED? Have I ever not been kissed? RIDDLE ME THAT!?!?
Also, apparently I haven't really been kissed until I've been kissed by Emma ;) ahaha.
WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL? All of them.

BORED!!!!

Tue, 10 May 2005 16:58:42 GMT

Bored bored bored bored,
bored bored bored bored,
bored bored bored bored.

Lunch needs to occur soon.
Hey,
you guys who have permits,
did you need to do that drug and alcohol thing to get it?
Because,
I'm hearing from everyone that you only need it to get your licence.
My stepmom is evil.
ONE MONTH!
WOO!!!
If I don't see you today I'll die!

I hate chemistry.
But I love Mr. Mihordea.
But I hate Mr. Mihordea.
But I love Mr. Mihordea.

I hate that hes making us take the final super early,
because now I'm not going to do well.
I love that because of it we're doing a class picnic during the time we were supposed to be taking the final,
(the end of the day on tuesday.)

I don't know.
Oh well.
10th grade must end,
as all great things must end!

Except that it wasn't that great,
or bad either.
Actually,
wait,
during tenth grade I:
-broke up with one (or two people, depending on your definition of a relationship)
-fell out with a bunch of my friends from last year
-almost died the last month of first semester

but also,
during tenth grade I:
-Went to a pixies concert
-Developed some of the best friends ever (or further developed as in Caitlin's case)
-Made all A's first semester, despite the fact that I thought the chemistry tests, the ap everything, and all Mr. Winter's bullshit busy work were going to kill me, and that I was going to fail out of highschool and die
-ended up with the best guy in the entire world

Yeah,
I'll say it was a pretty good year overall.

Goals for today:

Sun, 08 May 2005 15:31:56 GMT

1. Stabbing that guy with a knife....
a knife of reason!!!!!
(hes a jerk! he fails. Caitlin, you can do a great deal better....)
2. Who wants to help me kill him?
3. You know whats terrible? Attractive skinheads. (::unnamed female:: was just telling me about her accidental flirting with some neonazi) Its like damnit! You're so hot! But you're a nazi!!!! AUGH!!!! Not that thats ever happened to me before.... ::cough Tony cough::

But, it doesn't happen anymore(HOORAY!!),
because,
I'm dating the most awesome guy ever!!!
You know I have to be super in love with him when the last time Joel tried to talk to me in the hallway, I was just like, uhhh, okay, whatever, I'm going to go...
(I remember a time when I would have blurted out something stupid, possibly just noises, then ran away, squealing with happiness, to make Jessica theother listen to every single detail of it, and overanaylyze it with me...)

It's crazy.
He makes me so happy and I totally don't deserve him,
hopefully he won't figure that out though,
because I don't know what I'd do without him.
I love him sooooooooooooooooooo much!!!!
Everything about him is perfect!!!
Last night at Piedmont park was the best ever,
(I love how we always make plans,
then don't follow them,
but everything ends up being perfect anyway)

I fail though,
I get a giant
F
on the term paper of life!!!

Because,
I overreact to things and I don't even realize what awesome friends I have,
I get so caught up in being paranoid and it completely screws me over.

I think I fully understand that dream now,
(I sort of did before, but not fully...)

Bascically, I trip, over a rock or something,
and fall on my arm,
when I sit up the skin on my arm has been ripped apart in three places,
leaving giant red holes in my skin,
Stone comes over so I tell him to stitch me up,
and I hand him a needle and some thread,
then he willingly stitches my arm up.

Its that I keep fucking myself up and then expect my friends to come sew me back together, and because they're wonderful, and the best ever, they do it.

Or maybe I'm just going insane because of all that basket weaving in art,
but I like the idea of the former better...

Matt is sooooooooooooooooooooooo great!!!!!!!
I mean, whoa,
he made me the coolest thing ever!!!!
I love him so much and I'm going to make everyone marvel at its awesomeness on monday!!!

hahaha! its jessica on the top and Matthew on the bottom,
very nice!!
;)

Isn't that excellent????

And its really fun to turn upside down,
over and over again,
heh,
yeah,
I'm cool.

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Note:
For
those
who
skim,
MATT
made the awesome thing,
not me,
( come on!!! i can barely even write my name, use some reason!!)
nice job reading,
illiterate mcilliteratetons!!!!

p.s.
I'm talking about you Caitlin!

I feel very strange, so obviously,

Sat, 07 May 2005 05:11:39 GMT

the only correct thing to do is type out some Bukowski poems.
that I love.

I love you Bukowski!
You dead bastard!

brown and solemn
by: Charles Bukowski

the dog jumps up on the bed
crawls over me.
"are you the Word?" I ask him.
he doesn't answwer.
"are you the Word? I'm looking for the Word."
he has brown and solemn eyes.
"I'm waiting for the Word," I tell him,
"I'm walking around like a man
in a large hot
frying pan."
he wags his tail and tries to
lick my face.

"listen," she says from the bathroom,
"why don't you get out of bed
and stop talking to that dog?"

my parents didn't understand me
either.

time
by: Charles Bukowski

one collapses and surrenders
not out of choice
or lack of intelligence
or bad teeth
or bad diet

one surrenders
because that's the BEST MOVIE
around.

once I was so disgusted
with the working of things
that I dialed the time
and listened to the voice
over and over again:

"it's now 10:18 and 20 seconds
it's now 10:18 and 30 seconds..."

I didn't like the voice
and I didn't care what time it was

yet I listened.

satisfied now
I'm glad somebody stole my last watch
it was so difficult to read

satisfied now
I've got a new one

it has a black face and
white hands

and I sit there and watch
the second hand
the minute hand
the hour hand
as outside
caterpillars crawl my walls
and finally fall
like empires
like old dead loves
and new loves
fall.

night's best

with my black-faced watch
with white hands.

assault
by: Charles Bukowski

bad shape. sick. can hardly hold my soul together
here in Hollywood
here on DeLongpre Ave. where the nurses live
where the experimental film makers live
where the trees live hot and sad in the sun.

here where the wheelchairs drift past
down from the home for the aged.

how long Chinaski?
how many more loves shot out of the sky?
how many more women?
how many more days and years?

pain walks through the shadows of this room.
I can feel it in my arms,
I can hear it rattling in my cheap air cooler.

I remember things and get up and walk about.
I can't stop walking
from one edge of the room to the other.

I was once a man content to be alone.
now I have been broken open,
everything has edges.

they have me-crazed and trapped.

they brought me out of myself.
they are working on me.
the onslaught is furious and relentless
and without sound.

the rivers spill over the dikes.
the sun smells like burnt cheese.
ten thousand faces on the boulevards.
I live with creatures whose existence
has nothing to do with mine.

I keep walking about this room.
I can hardly breathe.

I have given my pain a name.
I call it " Assault."

Assault, I say, will you please go out for a walk
and leave me alone?
will you please go out for a walk and
get run over by a train?

my few friends think I'm a very funny fellow.
tell me about Chinaski, they ask my girlfriend.

oh, she says, he just sits in this big chair
and moans.

they laugh.
I make people laugh.

Assault, I say, do you want something to eat?
were you once a racehorse?
why don't you
sleep?
take a rest?
die?

Assault follows me across the room
he leaps on my shoulder and shakes me.

Lorca was shot down in the road but here
in America the poets never anger anybody.
the poets don't gamble.

their poetry has the smell of clinics.
their poetry has the smell of clinics.
where people die rather than live.

here they don't assassinate the poets.

they don't even notice the poets.

I walk out on the street to buy a
newspaper.
Assault follows me.

we pass a beautiful young girl on the sidewalk.
I look into her eyes. she stares
back.

you can't have her, says Assault, you are an old man,
you are a crazy old man.

I'm aware of my age, I say with some dignity.

yes, and aware of death too.
you're going to die and
you don't know where you're going
but I'm coming along with you.

you rotten bastard, I say, why are you
so fond of me?

I get a newspaper and come back.
we read it together.

ah, my companion!
we bathe together, sleep together, eat
together, we
open letters together.
we write poems together.
we read poems together.

I don't know if I am Chinaski or
Assault.

some say I love my pain.

yes, I love it so much I'd like to give it to you
wrapped in a red ribbon
wrapped in a bloody red ribbon
you can have it
you can have it all.
I'll never miss it.

I'm working on getting rid of it, believe me.

I might jam it into your mailbox
or throw it into the back seat of your car.

but now
here on DeLongpre Ave.
we have just
each other.

AHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! YES!!!

Fri, 06 May 2005 00:37:30 GMT

Jessica Katelyn Baer's Aliases

Your movie star name: Bagel Lemon

Your fashion designer name is Jessica Florence

Your socialite name is Sister Sledge New York

Your fly girl / guy name is J Bae

Your detective name is Wolf Grady

Your barfly name is Bagel Jesus

Your soap opera name is Katelyn Northbrook

Your rock star name is Jew Your Mom

Your star wars name is Jesari Baemoz

Your punk rock band name is The Forlorn Laser Pointer

The Amazing Meganame Generator

Rock Eagle!!! (Finally)

Thu, 05 May 2005 02:05:54 GMT

WOOHOO CABINS!!!!!
(mmm, nasty cabins)

Nysssa!!!

Roman!!! Are those my headphones??? (probably, because his cd player was stolen, WITH MY PIXIES CD IN IT!!!)
Oh, what happened to us??
Crazy angsty Roman.

Mary and Claire!!!!!!!

I was soooo in love with Kati.

That was the bridge me and Kati spent one excellenttttt night on...

Heres a link to last year's entry on it:
(whoa, that was my first journal,
before even the where_ismy_mind one)

http://www.livejournal.com/users/yossarion/5062.html

AND!
NOW
FOR

THIS
YEAR'S

The bus Ride was more interesting than actually being there:

STONE AND DANIEL!
WOO WOO!

STONES EXCITED!
LOOK AT THAT FACE!!

Then some crappy kid stole Stone's seat so he made me let him sit with me,

AHHH!!!
COOTIES!!!!

Look at the mad skill Stone uses to open the package of gummi things!!!

Yeah,
Stone's lap and gummi things,
pretty exciting eh??

ITS CLAIRE!!

Daniels turning into the hulk!!

Just very, very slowly...

And the,
Disaster struck!!!

(I love rain!!)

THE TACKY EIGHTIES DANCE!!!

Claire preparing!!!

Mary preparing!!!

Doris not preparing, because shes not the kind of crappy person who would go to a corny eighties dance at a latin convention,
I love Doris!!!

At the dance:
(I can't believe I went)

Stone looks toooo cool in my headband!

Some Forrest kid,
being super gangster in Daniels awesome jacket!!!!

Thats all the pictures I took.
It was kind of a boring trip.
Oh well,

Me the day after,
(don't I look chipper)

And thats the bed I slept on,
pretty hot isn't it????

Yeah,
pretty awesome,
(but not at all!!)

THIS ENTREE (YES, THAT WAS INTENDED JERKFACE)

Wed, 04 May 2005 01:54:44 GMT

IS DEDICATED TO CAITLIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Things I love about Caitlin:

Shes absolutely beautiful, even though she doesn't seem to notice it,
but I think it just makes her even more awesome,
crazy wrong,
but awesome!!!!!

Shes got a really big penis,
I mean,

w-
o-
w!

Watch out guys!!!!!!!

Shes terribly amusing,
even though she makes me uncomfortable sometimes...

Shes going to father my racist babies!!!!!!
MMMMMMMMMmm,
delicioussssssssss racism.

But really,
shes been there for longer
and
more consistently
than anyone else has ever been,
even though she didn't have to be,
and even when I didn't deserve it.

I LOVE YOU CAITLIN!!!!!!!!!

Okay,

goals for this week:

-kick chemistry test's ass (not going to happen...)
-apparently me and Lamebert have an exceptionally overdue lunch date to fulfill saturday,
if she still loves me that is.
When I asked her she said she didn't love me,
but you know,
I'm sure she was just kidding....
-SEE CAITLIN!
I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUU!!!
-Work on projects/finals stuff
-Be nicer to Stone, because, there seems to be some weird stuff going on with him and the track team/listen to his song so he stops complaining to me about it
-whoever else loves me enough to see me
-MATT!

I LOVE MATT!

I'M GOING TO SEE MATT THIS WEEKEND!
(or I might die!!!)

Today:
AP exam!!!
Alix slapped me on the ass for good luck!
Or maybe just to slap me on the ass,
whatever!!

I probably didn't do well,
but thats okay,
because,
you still love me.

I hope.

Jessica Theother drove me home,
and I didn't die.

I was sooooo proud of HER!!!!

::awww!!! tear of pride::

Yesterday:
I love Caitlin and Chloe together,
excellent lunch,
and other stuff happened,
but my memory has turned to crap.

Also,
I love Sophie and Jordan!!!

Because,
they've been sad lately,
so,
you know.

P.S.
Those are terrible pictures.

P.P.S

I hope I don't still look like that, (but I probably do...)

P.M.S.

I agree with Bukowski on Mahler.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm,
Bukowski....

Oh Brandon,

Sun, 01 May 2005 04:02:40 GMT

no,
the conversation is still going on.

Yeah, Brandon missed the memo about hating French people,
and about how all jews are accountants, trying to take over the world
(with google).

That black people are secretly the followers of Jack Black.

And some famous white people include:
Michael Jackson(my favorite white woman),
Colin Powell
(the only person whos whiter than I am,
but still not as white as Brandon),
Tiger Woods.
And,
I can't remember.

That Devin has mad poetry skillz!!!!

Oh Em Gee!!!!

Brandon's got the hots fir Kati!!!!!

That beating up foreigners is the true national pastime,
and that suburbs are actually as uninteresting as people say they are.

and that British accents are sooooo h-o-t, hot!!!!!!!!!

Ahahahahaha! I love talking to Brandon on the phone!!!!

P.S. equal oppurtunity racism is the best racism there is!!!

"I hate everybody!"

Its realy exciting when things do shit,
so much that the outhouse is going to need some breathing room.

You know what is more interesting than the Latin Convention?

Mon, 25 Apr 2005 02:04:02 GMT

okay,
picture the best guy ever,
ever
possible.

Now multiply him by a million.

Now mulitply him by, say,
a gillion.

Matt is still better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love Matt!

Hes the sweetest, most wonderful guy ever,
and has mad "skills"
AHAHAHAHA!

Yeah,
it was wonderful seeing him,
but I probably wasn't much fun because I've been exhausted from the latin convention,
(mmm, sleep will be awesome)

Also,
I've just been feeling exceptionally insecure about my Grady social life,
and,
its always nice to see someone who definitely cares about you,
and whom you can care about back,
without being patronized for it.

What I'm saying is,
we have turtles now.

And I love them so much.

They're the best ever,
and I get to have one!!!!!!!!!!

Turtles won't leave me because I'm not ::insert one of the many ideal high school personality traits here that I do not fulfill:: enough.

And they're adorable.

A key mixture.

But I don't want people around me because they feel sorry for me either.

I wonder what I'll name her...

I don't like that I already know someone is going to get mad at me for being angsty,
because,
I understand its annoying,
but its how I feel.

I just don't know I suppose.

"I just can't find my place in this world"

one memorable rock eagle moment:

stone: (after drinking an icee) I feel sick...
me: Thats probably just the cancer, taking hold of your insides.
justin: haha, you're gonna die dude!

This is an interesting piece of information on Laura Bush I just found:

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 22:58:18 GMT

http://www.freerepublic.com/forum/a3910b26e685a.htm

and this is just the point of view from a conservative newspaper...

Perhaps this is common knowledge, and I just missed it,
but still,
whoa.

Why Sealab is definitely much, much better than ATHF:

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 18:28:42 GMT

Sealab's version of Apocalypse Now:

Captain Murphy: Did they say why they want to terminate my command?
Marco: They told me that you had gone totally insane, and that your methods were unsound.
Captain Murphy: Are my methods unsound?
Marco: I don't see any method at all, sir.
Captain Murphy: Are you an assassin?
Marco: I'm a soldier.
Captain Murphy: You're neither. You're an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill. SO WET WILLIE FOR YOU!

Sealab on Science:

Dr. Quinn: That shockwave created a subspace fracture.
Stormy: Take that, subspace!
Dr. Quinn: Shut up.
Stormy: No.

Stormy: Hey Quinns, check it out! We built a time machine! Stormy Two is gonna' go back in time, and, uh, fix it all... up, there. Fix it...
Dr. Quinn: You don't have the brain capacity to build a time machine.
Stormy: You're right. So I guess it's not so much a time machine... as it is a dodge ball cannon! Say hello to my little friend...

Sealab on Drug Abuse:

Captain Murphy: It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!

Sealab on Government:

Captain Murphy: Until we find the thief, I am declaring Martian law!
Sparks: Um, I think its martial law.
Captain Murphy: Silence! Under Martian law... uh... what are my powers, exactly?
Sparks: Under martial law, you could suspend habeas corpus, empower a posse comitatus...
Captain Murphy: That's crap. Mars is wild, untamed. I'm forming a cadre of Martian knights charged with enforcing Martian law.

Captain Murphy: I dub thee Sir Phobos, Knight of Mars, beater of ass.

Sealab on Literature:

Sparks: Debbie, I have something for you.
Debbie: Oh yeah? What?
Sparks: A book.
Debbie: What's the book?
Sparks: "A Modest Proposal".
Debbie: Who's it by?
Sparks: Jonathan Swift.
Debbie: And what's the book about?
Sparks: Eating babies.

Sealab on Love:

Hesh: Hesh wants some sex!
Stormy: Hesh! Get off! My tape's playing!
Hesh: Shut up. Debbie get down here... give Hesh some sex.
Stormy: Hesh, this isn't funny.
Hesh: You'll be real funny when I crack you with a pipe.
Stormy: Okay, I'm coming down there.
Hesh: Shut up.
Debbie: Well now... Hesh,
Hesh: Shut up!
Debbie: Um, okay... why do you think you would make a good father?
Hesh: Um... gimme a second... uh... sex.

Marco: Calm down, I'll see what I can do about finding your little toy.
Captain Murphy: It's not a toy. It makes real cupcakes, with a 40 watt bulb, and there's icing packets. But the secret ingredient is love. Damn it.
Marco: Just try to calm down, go have some pudding.
Captain Murphy: Pudding can't fill the emptiness inside me! But it'll help.

mmmm,
"daylishus"
("delicious", plus fun!)

I don't want to go back to school.
Bleh.
Next week I'm back with my crappy parents who I have to finish off my second week of grounding with.

While I was off on vacation, I didn't check livejournal once,
and damn was I happy.

Oh well, lots of drama I see, unsurprisingly.

I can't wait to get out of high school.

Even though the drama will, undoubtedly, persist throughout life, at least we should all start (hopefully) mellowing out within the next few years.

::crosses fingers::

Captain Murphy: Nails are like candy to robots, and we'll eat tires instead of licorice.
Debbie: Gah, no we won't.
Captain Murphy: Maybe YOU won't!

-This entry is dedicated to Caitlin and Francis Ford Coppola, because they're both awesome and both celebrated birthdays recently.

Also it is dedicated to Martin Sheen, for being an awesome crazy liberal actor,
and for being exceptionally tasty in the seventies...

The pope is dying...

Sat, 02 Apr 2005 00:06:37 GMT

and here I am wearing sunglasses in the dark

Stolen from Chloe:

Fri, 25 Mar 2005 22:34:32 GMT

Everyone leave a comment of things you associate with me. Objects, songs, ideas, whatever. Anything you think is a significant part of me, my life, or whatever.

(Today has been awesome, and I assume it will get even awesomerererer)

You know what makes me oh so proud?

Wed, 23 Mar 2005 01:01:59 GMT

Being quoted in people's profiles!

I'm in two right now!

WOO!

I'm such a loser.

Also, next person to mention a certain
you-know-who,
or make bets involoving myself and them dating,

is going
down.

The End!

"so you can you squeeze me into an empty page of your diary,
and supernaturally change me"

P.S.

Mr. Brown: O.K., let me tell you what Like a Virgin's about. It's all about this cooze who's a regular fuck machine, I'm talking morning, day, night, afternoon, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick.
Mr. Blue: How many dicks is that?
Mr. White: A lot.
Mr. Brown: Then one day she meets this John Holmes motherfucker and it's like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the Great Escape, he's digging tunnels. Now, she's gettin' the serious dick action and she's feeling something she ain't felt since forever. Pain. Pain. It hurts her. It shouldn't hurt her, you know her pussy should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks her it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time. You see the pain is reminding a fuck machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, "Like a virgin."
1. What is the geekiest part of your music collection?
"who's to say bagpipes are geeky? are you trying to play god? huh!?" -jessica beer. i don't actually have bagpipe music...

2. What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie?
Fly Away Home-me
Ace Ventura:Pet Detective/Earnest Goes to the Beach-Jessicatheother

3. If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?
I'd steal Alix's legs.-me
"hahahahhahahahahahhahaha" *laughs hysterically* -jessica beer

4. Do you have a completely irrational fear?
People are going to make me listen to Britney Spears in my sleep-me
Toe Socks-Jessica (Beer..who's wearing toe socks)

5. What is the little physical habit that gives away your insecure moments?
Quoting Movies. (Aka. 'This is the worlds tiniest violin. Playing JUST for the waitresses)-me
stabbing people-j.beer

6. Do you know anyone famous?
No-me
*says something, either JESUS or CHEEZE-ITS*

7. Spontaneous or planned?
um. i'll go with stalking.-both

8. Who should play you in a movie about your life?
Boy George
Antonio Banderas-J. Beer
(Pictures Antonio Banderas saying, "Joel is so hot. I want his body")

9. What do you carry with you at all times?
wow. this sucks. i'm stopping. it's jessica beers answers from now on.
a human child

10. What do you miss most about being a kid?
having a vagina.

11. Are you happy with your given name?
WHO?

12. How much money would it take to get you to give up the Internet for one year?
Joel Dean's body

13. What color is your bedroom?
void

14. What song were you listening to last?
In The Aeroplane Over The Sea

15. Have you ever been in love?
Remember that time I smelled like Gradma's Ass...

16. Do you talk a lot?
Just ask grandma's ass

17. Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?
I believe in Jesus. (She actually said Cheeze-its)

18. Do transient, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you?
We don't annoy anyone

19. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?
Don't you like friends

20. What is your ideal marriage location?

21. Which musical instrument do you wish you could play?

22. Something you love and hate?

23. What's the one language you want to learn?

24. What's one trait you hate in a person?

25. What kind of watch(es) do you wear?

26. Most frivolous purchase?

27. Do you consider yourself materialistic?

28. What do you cook the best?

29. Favorite writing tool?

30. Do you prefer to stand out or blend in?

31. What's one car you will never buy?

32. What kind of books do you like to read?

33. If you won the lottery?

34. Burial or cremation?
I choose being cryogenically frozen. then being launched
INTO SPACE
Note:(this is jessica. who's livejournal this is. I apologize for Jessica Beers randomness. I am in no way responsible for her lameness)

35. What's one thing you're a sore loser at?

36. If you don't like a person, how do you show it?

37. What kind of first impression do you think you give to people?

38. Are you a giver or a taker?

39. Favorite communication method?

40. How many drinks before you're tipsy?
*pretends to be a dinosaur*

41. Do you have problems changing clothes in front of friends?

42. Last movie that inspired you?

43. Favorite cartoons:

45. Any last words?

the end.

Just to clear some things up:

Tue, 22 Mar 2005 00:21:25 GMT

I went through this livejournal and put a 1 by everyone's name for each entry their name or screen name is in (except for some people on me and Jessica theother's hot list, because, it was a lot of people, and I didn't want to list them) (and, not including this entry)

Heres the results with Jessica theother as most, Caitlin second most, and Alix and Stone tied for third most:

Matt withoutthehat 1111= 4

Caitlin 1111111111111=13

Jessica theother 11111111111111111=17

Stone 1111111=7

Chloe 111111=6

Alastair 11111=5

Matt with the hat 111=3

Lee11111=5

Jordan 11=2

Marnie 1=1

Freshman Daniel 11=2

Kyle 11=2

Emma 11=2

Scott Douglas 1=1

Sophie 11=2

Sophie’s Matt 1=1

Joy 1=1

Alix 1111111=7

Brandon 111111=6

Tye 11111=5

Kati 11=2

Julia 111=3

Mr. Mihordea 1111=4

Joel 1111=4

Youth Creates Alex 1=1

Jacob 11=2

Leah (Galloway? Is that how u spell it?) 111=3

Amelia 11=2

Ramika 111=3

Zach 1=1

Rachel 1=1

Britain 1=1

Miss Nettles 1=1

Greg Greico the Griot 1=1

Michael Jackson 11=1

Emma (Grady) 1=1

Emocameron 1=1

Mr. Winter 1=1

So there.

Yes.

Mon, 21 Mar 2005 02:09:42 GMT

Heres two ultimately unimportant polls:

1. Are me and Stone really the same person, because, everyone from Dan to Stone himself has declared this, repeatedly, as in, so many times I'm sick of hearing it.

2. If you were to associate me with any animal what would it be? (mostly I get "cat" from people")

I really get sick of high school. Its very cruel, and very bullshit. Theres all these social classes, and thats what pisses me off more than anything. I get so sick when I see the few sincerely nice people there being treated terribly because they don't meet the right standards. I'm not even going into the whole hating people drama crap.

I hate myself for partaking in it all.

I just want everyone to love everyone else!!!!

"Yes I am blind,
no, I can't see the good things,
just the bad things,

yes I am blind,
no, I can't see,
there must be something horribly wrong,
with me..."

"...yes I am blind,
but I do see,
the evil
people
prosper
over the likes of you and me
always..."

Do you ever get that feeling of, wow, I hate everyone!

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 02:47:17 GMT

so much!

Except Caitlin (because if otherwise she'll slam me into a wall),
(ouch)
who I need to plan a rocky horror trip with because our last one was awesome.

I'm so impatient I'm going to die.
Augh.

Now, wittiness:

Jean-Paul Sartre on comebacks: "Hell is- YOUR FACE!"

AHHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I LOVE MYSELF!

Wed, 09 Mar 2005 01:48:57 GMT

1. "softly you would sing, swinging in your swing, it wasn't night it wasn't day"
2. "I soon forgot myself and I forgot about the brake, I forgot all the laws and I forgot about the rain"
3. "and I'll run in the rain till I'm breathless, when I'm breathless I'll run till I drop, the thought of a fools kind of careless, I'm just a fool waiting on the wrong block"
4. "its been 97 days since I laid my head beside you, and theres a nillion miles of highway in between"
5. "please, please, don't leave me here"
6. "I used to dream he'd appear, now as I sleep I can sense him, and I know hes here"
7. "Ernest Hemingway would always be there for me, but now Ernest Hemingway is dead now"
8. "I'm too old to be, keeping up with all of the kids, uh keeping up with all of the kids"
9. "I'm not the world's most physical guy, but when she squezzed me tight she nearly broke my spine"
10. "armageddon, come armageddon, come armageddon come"
11. "well I'm putting it down, well youre not picking it up, and I'm putting it down, but you treat me like a clown, and I don't wanna be funny"
12. "when you think the light has seen your mind, that inside you're twisted and unkind, let me stand to show that you are blind, please put down your hands, cuz I see you"
13. "Toréador, en garde, Toréador, Toréador, et songe bien, oui, songe en combattant, qu'un oeil noir te regarde, et que l'amour t'attend, Toréador, L'amour t'attend"
Translation:
"Toreador, on guard, Toreador, Toreador, and dream away, yes, dream in combat, that a black eye is watching you, and that love awaits you, Toreador, love awaits you"
14. "did I waste my time, I think I did, I worked for life"
~~15. "I said I wanna be a singer like Lou Reed, I like Lou Reed she said"~~
16. "in the afternoon, riding the scapegoat, burning equipment, decomposing, cool off your jets, take off your sweats, I got a funny feeling, they got plastic in the afterlife"
17. "i want to come again and stay, smile and that will mean I may"

BECAUSE I'VE SEEN!
OH!
BLUE SKIES
THROUGH THE TEARS
IN MY EYES
and I realize,
I'm going home...

everywhere its been the same,
feeling,
like I'm outside in the rain
18. "I'm better now, please fuck off, what else you gonna say , while you're back on your stay, maybe something, maybe nothing, we'll see, its just too bad, you're beautiful I guess, I wasn't for you and you weren't for me"
19. "Wish I was ocean size, they cannot move you, man, no one tries"
20. "Love is you, you and me, love is knowing, we can be"
21. "all that I ask of you is one thing that you'll never do, would you put yor arms around me, I won't tell anyone"
22. "a long time ago, I turned myself, into you"
23. "there are some bad people on the rise, they're saving their own skins by, ruining people's lives"
~~24. "and he said oh boy you are so pretty"~~

there will be six m ore later, but i have to go and i dont want to lose this, first person to get the most right wins my frizzigin love.